Storybook Love

dresses and whatnot

2010-03-10T21:27:00.004+08:00

for some reason, I'm real easy when it comes to my all my wedding related clothes - except my for beach wedding.

For akad nikah, khatam mengaji and bersanding, mommy and I bought all the materials at one place - my mom's favourite place. My dad requested for us to wear white during nikah so mommy picked this really nice white chiffon for me and white satin for Gruffy. We weren't sure how much material to get for Gruffy so I stood next to the male mannequin they had at the store and told the lady that we want material as much as they needed to make baju melayu for that mannequin =P .

For khatam mengaji, I am going to recycle my Malay engagement baju and again, mommy picked the material and the color. It's not that my mom is fussy, but she just has great eyes and taste when it comes to kain-kain ni. She picked really light pink chiffon and yesterday I got Gruffy's baju melayu of the same shade of color. We're also gonna wear them for the 3rd part of our photo session which will be at Heritage Station. So I'll be wearing it for photo shoot first, then engagement, then khatam mengaji. I've had my khatam mengaji back when I was in primary school, but I thought it'd be nice to have it so I agree when mommy suggested it. Plus my nephew wants to do it with me and he's the closest person to me other than my parents - it means a lot to me that he wants to do it with me.

For bersanding, our color scheme is silver-ish grey. Again, mommy picked that =P (trust me, I'd want her to keep choosing and picking materials for baju kurung as long as she likes to). I'm not a big fan of bright colors and I'd love for the whole affair to be simple yet nice.

All 3 clothes will be kurung moden with slightly different touch for each of them - I sent all of them to the chinese lady who has been making my baju for ages and my favorite has got to be this

my mommy picked the materials and initially I wasn't sure whether it'd turn out great - it was orange organza with green lining. But the color turned out amazing and my tailor did amazing extensive beading that complimented the baju - it was a lot but it looked really neat and elegant if you get what I mean. The fit of her clothes has always been great and comfortable.

So when we sent all the kain to her, I asked her what she thought of the design cos honestly I am such a noob when it comes to that so when she suggested I should just go for something cclean and simple because the materials mommy got were all pretty on their own, I agreed, she came up with few designs, I added bits and bobs and you all will see my tak seberapa baju in June :) well you'll of course see my engagement cum khatam mengaji baju in few days hehe

For our beach reception, I'd love a somewhat traditional wedding dress but of simpler design since it will be at the beach and all. I have been looking for months but haven't found any that tickled my fancy. Gruffy helped to look at quite a few of them and finally we have narrowed them down to just 3. Here they are, not in any particular order, I kinda like 'em all.

Gruffy's top favourite is no. 2 - but I'm leaning more to no. 3, reason being that I am short and small and somewhat fitted dress would look better on me, I think. So we're gonna look at bridal houses when Gruffy's here and see what we could find. At first I was gonna go with a Terani Couture dress which is really cute, so Hani and a little bit whimsical but the problem is it has too many horizontal lines - I am short so that's not gonna look good on me. So we decided it'd be nice to just have a white dress that will be casual yet dressy enough for a bride :)

tapi saya gemok bagaikan butterball sekarang - how how how?!?!? that's why lah fussy hoho

72 hours to go!

2010-03-10T19:29:00.003+08:00

My baby arrives Saturday morning! BIG YEAY!!!!

He'll be here for about a week and this will be a busy week; visit to US embassy and immigration office, get HIV test done, go for express pre-marriage course with Gruffy that my parents have arranged (don't know which day yet), meeting with our Avillion planner, pre-wedding photo session and of course, our second engagement.

In between those I wanna go on movie dates and shopping for some of our wedding gifts - so do pray we manage to get the official things done smoothly so I have more quality time with my baby!

I called my mommy yesterday to ask her about door gifts/favors for engagement. My parents are having kenduri doa kesyukuran after sembahyang Jumaat and then Nathan's "side of family", that will be led by my PakTeh will arrive some time after that.

After like 2 mins, mommy called me back and said "you're coming back this weekend right? You need to help me with some stuff" to which I replied of course, cos Nathan's arriving on Saturday morning and she went somewhat crazy after that cos she totally lost track of time and thought we had another week before my long break - my mommy's so cute sometimes when she's too caught up with things ;)

I managed to find really nice and good quality songket for Gruffy to wear during solemnization and another one for him to wear with a baju melayu I got him for pre-wedding and during engagement yesterday :) I think my baby will look very cute in baju melayu, and no I am not biased hahaha he is the most good looking guy, ever =P

I'm heading home tomorrow since my mom's all panicky and asked me to take Friday off to help her with things. So straight I go after athletic events tomorrow.

I'm excited!!

Dear Nathaniel

2010-03-07T20:42:00.009+08:00

I MISS YOU!!!!!!!

roti rambut

2010-03-07T19:33:00.005+08:00

for bersanding I've decided to get my hair done in a bun but nothing to fancy, messy or complicated. And I don't want to wear veil or crown, if I can argue my way out with my cousin's make up artist hehe

If they could do it (my hair isn't that long) I'd like a clean sleek bun like this or something similar so long it looks good and suits me and my funny looking face

with minimal hairpiece like she has - I am thinking since my cousing taukeh fresh flowers, I can request for specific flowers to be used as hairpiece.

For akad nikah I am wearing tudung (iye, saya akad nikah kat pejabat agama tau hehe) abah kata buat dekat function room diorang) - tu nanti I go find with Gruffy. He said I look cute wearing one hehe he saw me on skype before I left for kursus kahwin this morning (takde kena mengena tp saje je nak cakap my fiance thinks I am cute haha). So don't need to kacau rambut.

for our beach reception, again I want something simple and also more relax - for this reception I have Fiona's associate hair and bridal make up artiste to do it. I've looked at pictures, they all look really sweet and pretty. And I have a compliment trial session I have yet to arrange with Emilia because of my current location but I trust them :)

I'd like to get something as simple and easy like this tapi macam cannot cos my hair isn't that long

so maybe just a loose bun, again with flowers or something that's similar and simple.

Or should I just cut my hair shorter and rock the look on my wedding day? haha

super adorable. The only problem is I am not! haha so how to rock any kind of hairstyle lah like this hoho

Sushi!

2010-03-07T12:05:00.007+08:00

Hani has been posting a lot about upcoming events and wedding preparations. She's providing lots of good details so I won't interject, but let me say at least that thing are going very well and we're (finally!) moving in the right direction. I'm looking forward to this upcoming trip and of course to the wedding trip in June.

This short post is mostly to brag: I made sushi successfully!

I love sushi... I could eat it every day. I've had this dream of being able to make sushi, so that I could have it whenever I want. I don't care what kind it is or what style it is, I just love it all! So for a couple years I've wanted to learn how to make sushi.

For Christmas (at my suggestion) my sister got me a sushi-making kit. It comes with a mat (for rolling sushi), two little plates, two saucers, two pairs of chopsticks, and a little book that teaches how to make the rice, how to make the different styles of sushi, what ingredients go well together, and so on.

Today (yes, it took me three months to get up the courage to try it!) I tried my hand at making hand-rolled sushi (the one that looks like a cone). I made the rice, and while it was cooking and then cooling I chopped, sliced, and cooked all sorts of veggies to use: yellow squash, mushroom, eggplant, avocado, and carrot.

Then once the rice was done I started rolling: put the rice on the seaweed, press down to make a little indentation, add wasabi, add mushrooms, carrot, and avocado, then roll up and seal with a grain of rice. Then devour!

If I told you how many of these I made and immediately ate you'd call me a pig, so I won't! Looking at them on the plate it looks simple, but getting the rice right was kind of tricky. I intend to practice a lot more, especially with different things to put inside, and one day I'll use fish, eel, etc. as well. I want to make rolled sushi too, and now that I got my toes wet I think I'm going to be making sushi all the time!

Hani would be proud: I even cleaned up this huge mess after I finished!

"Black & Tan: a crime of fashion"

2010-03-05T19:58:00.004+08:00

our pre-wedding photo shoot (never thought I'd ever be in a "photo shoot") is on the 16th which is like slightly more than a week from now - and I'm freaking out!!

I know the concept, I pitched the idea to Nathan as well as our photographer; they're both are cool with it. But I haven't actually figured out what to wear!!

For the casual outdoorsy ones I was thinking either easy breezy dress or top+jeans or skirt combo. I told Gruffy since we're having an Alice themed wedding, I might go with Alice's color palette for my outfit: white+powder/baby blue+black. But I have yet to find things I like. I do have the black part of the outfit; my bow headband and bow knitted cardigan (F21 rocks my socks!). So now is the quest for something white and something blue.

On top of that, have to go find kebaya lama for the one that'll be at Heritage Hotel. And find Gruffy's baju melayu and capal - gonna be a challenge getting this without him. But I think I'll be able too.

I will have somewhat free-er time next week. I have sports practise till Wednesday but it only goes up to 11 so I can quickly go home, refresh and go hunt for these things.

Then only I can tell Fiona what color I want for my bouquet for the photo shoot - she asked me earlier but I honestly haven't got the slightest idea just yet!

hopefully things will work out fine. I do trust our photographer to capture the best shots so I am not that worried - well I am but not about the photo crews. So long I don't look like I giant peach cobbler or don't ever find my face on google with tacky labeled all over my face, I think I'll be just fine hoho

a wonderland of our own

2010-03-03T21:36:00.003+08:00

with just about 3 months left before our big day, I find myself panicking at random times of day - I could be marking books and out of the blue thought of a detail and quickly find my planner and jot it down. I haven't had a good night sleep for few days now because I keep playing how I want the reception to turn out in my head and each time, I'd remember something and quickly google for it and there goes my night.

You bridezillas know what I mean right? We hardly feel like the minute passes by when we look for wedding related stuff ;)

Our second reception means a lot to me. For one, everything is up to me - the concept, the theme, everything. I don't need to consult my parents regarding cultural practices because it's not gonna be a traditional reception. It also means lots to me because I get to share and somewhat showcase the love and the kind of relationship we have with my friends - I know that my friends are happy for me and what better way to celebrate and share that if not with a fun dinner party where everyone can relax, have yummy dinner, chit chat without having to worry about things like we usually do at a formal kinda reception.

So when I was looking at possible venues, I had 2 popular themes in my head; garden or beach wedding, with the later being my preference between the two. Initially a beach wedding seems like one that's gonna cost heaps and finding a location that's somewhat easy access to ppl is next to impossible. We'd have to go to an island which means that our guests would have to go to the island too and there was gonna be tons of other side expenses that I wasn't willing to bear.

Then I found Avillion and the second I looked at the site, I knew it was the one :) it's in Port Dickson, which is about half hour from Seremban and an hour from KL so location-wise, it's pretty strategic. The wedding package they have looks great too.

So I emailed the guy, Amir, who is officially our planner and he got back to me with a quotation - and I was surprised at how affordable the whole thing will be. It was within budget that we can afford to add things here and there to enhance the things they've already included. We love the bridal suite that comes with the package and we also get spa package for 2 and trust me, the spa is TDF! I plan to have a girly session with my maid of honor and bridesmaids there once we're done with everything :)

At first it was just going to be a beach reception - we're gonna say our vows and do something to signify our new life as husband and wife and have a dinner party follows after. But about 2-3 weeks ago, I browsed through my Aussie student's photos (her name's Nikki) and came across her 16th birthday party which was a themed birthday party - a tea party based on Alice in Wonderland. Right there and then I knew I want to incorporate the theme with my beach wedding :)

I told my bridesmaids and maid of honor to get their feedback and input and we right away started to look for things that we want to include. And I am really loving it :) I don't plan for it to be costume-y or done in great detail or done like a 5 year old birthday party. I plan for it to just have that whimsical yet fun ambiance where everyone could just relax and hopefully it will be a reception that they will like, enjoy and remember :)

It's also interesting when I found out that Ashlee Simpson used the same theme for her wedding and it was Mindy Weiss who planned it - Mindy Weiss is the lady whom I got my planner from :) I took some ideas from her wedding and it's surprising how many other people actually have used or plan to use the same theme for their wedding. It's very cool cos they help me with ideas and some people I've contacted gave me some good suggestions too. Etsy has also been a great site to find inspirations for things I can do on my own - like my invitation card :) I'll share the card here once I'm done with it :)

Gruffy, as usual lets me have my way even when I'm about to turn our reception cartoony :P

I've chosen my dress and I have set the theme color for my bridesmaids and maid of honor. when Gruffy's here, we're gonna look for a ready-made sleek suit for him and I was thinking of borrowing my dad's pocket watch and requests for Gruffy to wear it, to go with the theme - better than wearing a top hat right babe? ;)

I've also ordered cupcakes and macaroons for each table from Aishah Cuppylicious and have them customized according to the theme. I still haven't decided on wedding favors, which I need to decide really soon. People suggested customized teabags but I'd like to get things that people can keep. So I'll keep looking :)

What important is that I manage to so far get things I want well within budget and I'm happy about that. And it's good to know that there are still lots of people who don't over charge, give affordable price for extremely good quality items.

And blogging about this reminds me that I need to send the original copy of the invitation to Gruffy and have him fix it a little bit by doing something geeky =P So better do that now!

the truth

2010-02-28T22:08:00.003+08:00

I hate being in a long distance relationship. I love Nathan like crazy but I hate being apart. I know that it was my own choice, no one forced me and I certainly know that the distance is worth it. But at the same time I hate it.

I knew from the get go it would be tough hence the phone calls, skype, text msgs, visits during hols. We do everything we possibly can to make the distance bearable for the both of us.

Until last night.

I could not get a hold of Nathan for 4 straight hours. I called again and again without fail, sent txt msgs and I got no response. After the first hour I was already crying and freaking out and had no idea what to do. I finally called my dad-in-law and told him that I couldn't get through to Nathan's phone. What had me worried sick was the fact that he told me he wasn't feeling well.

What if something had happened? How would I know? Who would tell me? He just moved to St. Pete and spent most of his days in the office - no neighbours, no friends yet that I could call so they could help to check on him.

I was scared, crying while trying to get through to his phone. I didn't remember what happened next but I guess I fell asleep while juggling the above 3. The next thing I knew was that he called me on skype, I picked up and he said his phone was having reception problem.

And I was worried for nothing?

Don't get me wrong, of course I'm glad that he's ok and nothing bad has happened but I hated what I had to go through last night. The worst thing is that I'm upset but I don't know at what or for what reason.

All I could think about last night was the thought of losing my fiance and having to go through life without him by my side. I honestly cannot imagine that. My whole body hasn't really stopped shivering every 5 mins - I tried to do work and settle some wedding details, just to get my mind away from things.

It doesn't work. If I could, I just wanna go ahead and marry him as soon as I can, no fancy reception or whatever and be where ever he is. and yes, even if I have to quit my job there and then.

I'm sorry if some of you think I'm losing my mind by thinking that I'm throwing my life here away - job, security. But I don't think I can ever forgive myself if something happens to Nathan and I am not there. I might regret quitting my job and giving up the kind of security with living here, but I don't ever want to have regrets when it comes to Nathan.

I'm sorry that I am such a wreck - I really don't expect you to understand.

list of things

2010-02-26T18:07:00.003+08:00

The weekend starts early this week cos today is Maulidur Rasul but I can't go back to my parents' house :( I have sukan zon tomorrow, I'm the head coach so I have to be there booooooooooo!! So sorry lah mommy, cannot help you with things for my Malay engagement. She just told me yesterday she'll go ahead and do everything, I can fix them later when I am home - but if my mom's the one who does thing, I don't think things need any fixing :)

That includes family reception - I basically just add things here and there and since people who'll be attending that one are mostly family, neighbours, my parents' friends, I leave the details of favours and whatnot to them. They know those people better. Takde la I lepas tangan but I let them do what they think is best and I just go with it. But I do make sure that we discuss about things and decide after we take everyone's input into consideration.

Now for my second reception-this I have to do all alone. Lucky I have Cyan who always keeps me up to date with fresh bright ideas, links to websites and all. Earlier she helped me with fixing my invitation for the reception.

One of these days, I need to meet up with the guy from the resort to discuss settings and decorations. Both are included in the wedding package but since I'm having a somewhat themed wedding, I need to change things here and there and add some too - so long I am within our budget, it should be ok.

So things I need to find and look for the best deal, hopefully can get them in bulk/bundle, so maybe dapat harga borong or something are:

1. Bright colored paper lanterns

2. mushroom-shaped lights, preferably like these ones. They're solar powered, meant to be put outdoor and adorable

3. Bright colored tablecloth/runner. The resort obviously include tablecloth and all, but I wanna have an additional one that will better fit the theme ;)

maybe for the tablecloth I'd wanna go with a chessboard print or something like that. I'm not so sure yet. I'm also thinking of putting a few of those pink lawn flamingos, if I could find place that sells them really cheap.

I looked at tablecloth material here but like anything else in Pontian, everything is more expensive. Sawee suggested that I look for them at Kamdar or Nagoya, which I will soon and I'll drag Cyan to come with me hoho

I also need to finalize my choice of flowers. I love tulips but there's no way they could get them so they put down karla lily which is great too. But I don't wanna use lilies for everything so I need to look for more different ones and tell them before April comes!! Rush rush rush!!

I wish I was closer to home so planning and carrying out the plans would be easier. But that isn't the case so I have to make do haha

Btw, if any of you have old chess sets or playing cards you no longer use, can donate to me lah! hehehe I need them for some parts of the decorations. And oh, old teapots too! :)

10 adorable things about Nathan

2010-02-25T16:49:00.009+08:00

1. Countless surprises like spontaneous candlelight dinner; home cooked spaghetti with meatballs

2. Decorates Christmas cookies&gingerbread men using Children's cookie kit instead of fussing over complicated recipes.

3. Getting excited over something he enjoys or likes or loves, going "This is soooo cool baby!!"

4. The "Monk" Jig

5. Excellent impersonation of Eeyore and pretends that he's lost his tail too

6. His penguin pjs pants

7. Fishy kissy face

8. Countless model poses

9. Surprise kisses ;)

10. His willingness to be silly with me =D

I love you a million Reese's peanut butter cups!

The Moment, The One

2010-02-23T20:16:00.005+08:00

alert - long post ahead. And a mushy one too. Don't say I didn't warn you.

you know, I'm really lucky. And I'm not just saying that to boost my ego...well maybe a little bit but I guess when it is actually the truth, I guess it doesn't really matter ;)

well, back to being lucky. I meant to say that I am very lucky because I have found the one. Sure I don't know what the future holds and how our marriage will turn out, but one thing I am sure of is that at the moment, we plan to spend our lives with each other. True that plan could change, but the thing with planning something is that we always plan to achieve a goal - regardless of how the plan may change, the goal does not. And I know I have Nathan's hand in mine...walking towards that goal together.

Most people grew out of their fondness of fairytale and happily ever after, thinking, or maybe trying hard to convince themselves that it doesn't exist. Well with divorce rates skyrocketing through the roof and more often than not we experience unfaithfulness, fairytale is rarely chanced upon. And believing in fairytale, I think is somewhat related to being optimistic about relationships and I can admit that it is tough to be optimistic and positive about relationship these days.

Because we are only human and we will always feel all sort of emotions - it's normal; love, sadness, suspicion. What important is that we know how to handle them the right way, even better when our partner sticks by our side through and through.

So I am lucky. Because Nathan has been by my side from the get go. We didn't have things easy. I had a lot of insecurities, heck I still have some if not all, but more then when we just started because there were tons of changes we had to adapt to.

The relationship started when I only had less than a week of physical time with him. Well I guess we knew we liked each other lots prior to that but we started calling it official after Nathan told me he loved me for the first time. It was probably the next most significant moment of my life so far after the night he proposed of course.

We were talking and mucking around and I think at some point he was tickling me. I told him I was gonna take my shower and he asked me to wait a little longer. I've developed this habit of counting the second each time he says "one sec, babe" so naturally I started counting. I think I got to like 6 or 7, and of course I counted in a joking manner when he put his finger on my lips, asked me to be quiet and like nanosecond after that he said "I love you"

Like when he proposed, I was pretty much tuned out to my surrounding after he said those words but as soon as I snapped out of it, I was happy beyond words could ever describe. But as soon as the love sunk in my head and in my heart, while I was happy about it, I was sad and insecure about us.

I was going back home because my trip was ending soon and not long after that, Nathan was moving to Florida to start his new life there.

I was scared of how committed he could be with us not having so much somewhat foundation to the relationship and I was scared that he'd find someone better in Florida - he was after all starting a new life, would be meeting new people and whatnot. And these insecurities showed of course.

We talked on the phone every time we had the chance to but if there was anything that I wish I did not have to go through, would be that first break between visits, between the 1st one when our relationship officially started and the 2nd. I guess we were going through what other couples go through after the initial courtship phase faded away, only we had to go through it differently. I am not sure whether it worked to our advantages or not, but I guess, looking at where we are now, I can honestly say that I'm glad things were the way they were. While I wish that i didn't have to go through that, in some weird ways, I am glad I did. I am glad we did.

I learned that if I have doubts about my trust in him, I definitely have more doubts trusting myself and the relationship. So like everything else, I had to fix myself first, and I believe when we try to fix ourselves first before trying to fix everything else, things would actually be ok on its own. And while the process of fixing myself wasn't easy and I am nowhere near perfect, I am glad I was lucky enough to have experienced all these things.

Like fairytale, to get to the happy ending is never easy. If there was dragon or poisonous apple or evil witch that they have to battle against in storybooks, in real life those things, in some ways, represent the many feelings and emotions we deal with. But of course, we go through it anyway, good or bad. And there's never a regret. And I am very very glad.

Because I believe every little thing plays a highly significant role in taking us where we are now; engaged and going to be married. And I don't have anyone else to thank other than Nathan. Because I am sure you know how crazy a girl could get when insecurities get the best of her. But he stuck by me through it all and I am very sure that he'll never let go.

Cos I am lucky to have found a guy who values love, relationship and faith as much as a good guy would and should. And he is a nice guy. I'm privileged to have seen a glimpse of the husband and the father he'd be when I spent my winter holiday with my future in laws. I'm so in love with my in laws. My future dad in law is the nicest father in law anyone could as for; he is supportive, caring, committed and funny as hell :) the exact traits I see in Nathan and I believe they will blossom more and more with time.

As clear as our blog title is, we do have a storybook love. And we are so fairytale that it makes people sick sometimes ;) In about 4 months, we'll be able to close the book with a happy ending, and will start a new one that will record our journey to a happily ever after.

And I am lucky. To have experienced the moment, when I realized I have found the one...every moment Nathan says "I love you".

2010-02-22T09:17:00.005+08:00

I cooked tonight. Actually I cheated, the sauce came from a jar, but seeing how irregularly I've cooked in the past few months I'm not going to hold myself to an extremely high level of cooking accountability! I like to cook and I'm not completely unskilled at it, but I certainly wouldn't describe myself as "a cook". It's more that I find it fun and I eat absolutely anything (so even if it turns out bad, I'll finish it!).

Tonight I made chicken and mushrooms in vodka sauce over pasta - nothing too exciting but it was good. I always cook enough for multiple meals, so I'll have leftovers for the next couple dinners.

See the blue glow in the back corner? This stove is one of those flat-surface stoves.. it's a solid black flat surface and it's heated from underneath by infrared light. Infrared light shows up as blue on a digital camera. This stove has the knobs positioned opposite the stove in my old apartment and I haven't gotten used to it yet, hence the wrong burner being turned on!

I like pasta, but I like everything; Hani told her mom that I'm a garbage bin, I just consume anything thrown into my mouth! Tonight's pasta was quickly dispatched.

Hani and I like to cook together and for each other. She cooks all sorts of stuff for me; because my knowledge of Malaysian cuisine is lacking it's often a new experience. Hani is a great cook (I wish I had a picture of her in her apron!) and she likes to fatten me up. When she was visiting most recently I would come home from research on campus to find delicious meals. One day she made chicken gizzards (which I had completely failed to make by myself about a month previously); there's nothing like biking home to find Hani and a plate of gizzards waiting for me! (Ok, really it's all about finding Hani there, the meal was just gizzard-icing on the chicken-cake.)

We have three food-traditions when it comes to me cooking for Hani. First, I cook the steak for a steak dinner and Hani cooks the veggies. I'm no steak pro but Hani loves my beef! (Err... maybe I should rephrase...).

Second, I cook spaghetti for Hani. I enjoy spaghetti so you might imagine I can down quite a few noodles. But Hani? Man, you should see this girl go! I'm barely half way through my plate and she's finished! She loves spaghetti and often times eats the leftovers for breakfast the next morning! Seeing her enjoy it so much encourages me to cook better spaghetti, with better sauce, each time. I want to try making my own sauce base (from scratch - i.e. tomatoes) but for now I just buy the canned stuff and add the veggies, meat, etc.

Third, I cook the Thanksgiving poultry. In case you Malaysians aren't familiar with the holiday, in the US family's get together on Thanksgiving day (in late November) and eat a massive meal. There are a few staples for such a feast: cranberry sauce, pumpkin pie, and typically a huge turkey. Hani and I couldn't eat a whole turkey so we went for smaller birds; in 2008 I made Cornish hens and in 2009 I made a duck.

In many families around the world the woman does most of the cooking, including the major meal that is Thanksgiving. We sort of adopted this tradition of man-makes-the-bird from my parents; I was born on Thanksgiving day (but Thanksgiving moves around each year) and so my mom, on the verge of labor, was in no condition to be in the kitchen. Unfortunately she went into labor before my dad could finish cooking - I believe the turkey ended up sitting in the kitchen sink as they rushed out the door to the hospital! Ever since then my dad cooks the Thanksgiving turkey (my mom does the rest of the meal) and Hani and I have somehow picked that up.

Back to how great of a cook Hani is! She's made me lots of stuff, like chicken rice, some really good dish with anchovies, spicy chicken and beef dishes, and fried rice. Occasionally I try to make similar dishes by myself but it never turns out as good; either she has some special tricks or I just don't have the gift! I also love to help out while Hani is cooking but she'll tell you that I'm more of a nuisance than I am a help: a lot of the time is occupied by me trying to stir something too much or too often and Hani telling me to let it alone.

I asked for (and received) a kit and book on how to make sushi for Christmas. That is, I asked for it as a Christmas gift, not that it's a book on making Christmas sushi. English grammar sucks! Anyway, I bought the rice, mirin, and seaweed and I have egg and some other things. I need to get some cucumber and carrot and avocado and I'm going to give it a shot one of these days. I have this dream of being able to make delicious sushi whenever I feel like it... we'll see how far that dream gets.

Finally, here's a picture of a big bird that flies around behind my apartment a lot. I guess this isn't related to the subject of this post, but who knows, maybe I'll catch him and cook him for Thanksgiving this year! I say "him" because there's a couple female versions (they're the same size but bright white, not grey) and he chases them around a lot until they hide up in the trees. It's hard to tell in these pictures but this is a pretty big bird. He probably comes up to about my waist.

Well I'm full now, but that doesn't stop me from missing Hani's cooking. There's many reasons why I'm marrying this girl and I've never been hung up on domestic skills, but I have to admit, I love being spoiled by her cooking!

Pre-Wedding Ideas

2010-02-21T19:52:00.003+08:00

thanks to all who gave suggestions on locations :) Manoq and Cyan both suggested The Heritage Station - that place is classy, romantic and exudes all the right emotions. After reading the site i.e. its terms and conditions, I've decided to put that location in our list.

At first I wanted to just have a somewhat casual photo session : cotton/linen dress, piggy back rides etc But after I thought about it and the number that we're spending on pre-wedding photos, I decided to use the hours we have with Fifoto well.

Fiona emailed me the quotations earlier, which look good btw and I replied back with some enquiries regarding our pre-wedding session (for second reception, I am pretty much settled cos the location is already going to be great, so I'm not worried). They are basically just questions about having multiple locations, in my case 3 locations that I have in mind.

1) KLCC - near the fountain (maybe the park too)
This location has a very special place in my heart because this was where Nathan caught me totally off guard, got down on one knee and proposed to me. I guess it will be a little tricky cos there'll be lots of people around but I'll find a way to make it work.

2) Taman Tasik Perdana
Just because it's a nice green place, with the lake and all. It's a nice set up. This one I can slash off my list if it isn't do-able but it'll be great if it's included.

For the above 2, I plan to stick to my casual fun loving mode. Something like this :

*source*

3) The Heritage Station
Like I said earlier, this location exudes all the right emotions related to being in love, getting married, romance and tons more. And since it also has that classy vibe, I'm gonna suggest to Gruffy that we wear more formal outfits. I'd like to save my wedding dress and Nathan's suit for our second reception so for this I'd like us to wear Malay traditional clothes - kebaya lama for me and simple baju melayu for Nathan. I'd like the photos to turn out classy with a pinch of fun in it and I really like vintage-ish Malay photos. Something like this :

*source*

Not with Nathan going too traditional like the above guy lah! I think that'd be overkilled! But come to think of it, it is a cute idea haha and of course the shoot will be indoor. I did think of going to a paddy field of some sort, but I'm trying to not spend on outstation cost. Plus Heritage Station is a great KL based location. So we'll make full use of it :)

So right now I am waiting for answers to these questions about locations from our photographer. Hopefully it's do-able :) if not, well Nathan and I always manage to make do with whatever we have so I'm sure we'll find something else that we could work with.

I can't believe I'm seeing him soon! Like in 3 weeks time! I miss him so so much and I can't wait to do all wedding related stuff with him when he's here even though most of them are painful official matters.

I'm going to give hime a wake up call soon. I work tomorrow *dreadsssssss* and need to go to bed earlier than I have the past week.Need to pitch these photo sessions ideas to him before then.

I also need to shed some weight for my pre-wedding photos!! Crash or not crash, I'm going to lose more weight!! Damn you christmas cookies, haunting me like the ghost of christmas past!!

Don't worry, I'll be safe!! :) And if you have any idea or more suggestions, do let us know! :)

totally buggered.

2010-02-18T22:56:00.006+08:00

I'm super knackered today. I slept at like 2am and then at 7 am my mom called asking me to wake up and get ready cos they wanna go see my cousin - we need to discuss and arrange stuff for family reception. The reason why we had to go so early was because my parents needed to be back before 5pm cos that's when my nephew finishes at school.

And I had an appointment with Steve from fifoto at 6. Crazy.

From Seremban to Sg. Buloh to Seremban then back to KL. Lucky the TrafficGods were nice and traffic was easy. And thankGod for auto transmission. Not like I could drive stick - it has been long forgotten. I love auto cars. They're easy to my messed up joints and nerve systems in my legs.

My cousin, K. Minah is a total pro when it comes to coordinating events; wedding, royalty birthdays, doing set-ups for various functions and whatnot. And F1 is her annual thing - I think she does all the flower settings or something like that, I didn't get to ask but she's got like more than 15 years experience of coordinating and planning events - she did Darling Ngasri's garden wedding too.

And it was lucky for us that mom called her as soon as we confirmed the dates because another person wanted her for the same weekend. And if we missed out on her, we'd have missed out on something big - she_does_everything....that it makes it easier for us.

So if any of you guys want to ask K. Minah for quotations or whatever can always email me :)

so caterers, canopy, tables, pelamin, bridal make up, settings and decos - all settled. She's gonna come over to measure up areas one of these days but all is well. And I love that she'll use fresh flowers for everything. I told her I don't want anything extravagant - just something sleek and simple.

So I am relieved. Just waiting for the actual numbers now.

As for photographer, I think we are pretty much settled on taking Fiona&her other photographers for our second reception. And pre-wedding too. I love their style and I fell in love with the samples of photos they had of previous couples who hired them.

Steve was very friendly too so I think we'll be just fine. For pre-wedding photos, we still are listing down possible locations. I told Steve that Gruffy proposed to me in front of the KLCC fountain so that has to be one of it - it was where everything started :) But I don't quite know other places in KL that will be great for pre-wedding photos so if you guys have any suggestion do tell me :)

can email me too! hrblythe@saying-i-do.com :)

Gruffy and I have been apart for most of the times during the course of our relationship but I think we have the closest tightest strongest bond despite that so I want my pre-wedding photos to show that - and also to show how cute we are when we are physically together lah! :P ok ok don't puke haha

I won't be putting on my second reception dress - at least I don't think so at the moment. It will totally be casual and fun and yes...cute!! :P now need to find something cute to wear for that photoshoot hehe it is nerve-wrecking. I am never good at posing but Gruffy is good - he can pull his GQ cover pose ;) . So I hope Steve (cos I think he'll be the one taking our pre-wedding photos) will manage to capture every second of our natural interaction - nothing that has to be put up just for the camera.

Now I just need to put in the number I got from Steve, talk it over more with Gruffy before I fill in the contract, fax it and pay 50% deposit.

I drove back to Seremban with a big smile on my face and managed to let out a few relieved sighs...heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! And now I am on my bed (technically it's my nephew bed since my room is still undergoing its makeover stage), finishing off this blog post and stretching my tired little legs from all that driving.

Next on the list - hunt for the perfect wedding bands :)

Compatibility

2010-02-14T10:51:00.004+08:00

There is an online dating service that advertises "we find your perfect match with over 15 types of compatibility" (or something like that). The idea is that you answer questions designed to characterize your personality, to render your self into a list of likes and dislikes. Your profile is cranked through a massive database of fellow love-seekers and a neat pile of steaming romance is produced.

I don't have anything against dating services - a coworker met his wife that way - but I doubt that match.com or plentyoffish.com would have put Hani and me together. We are diametrically opposed in many ways: I'm a tall nerd with the cold, mechanical heart of a robot and she's a short artist with an amazingly compassionate, kind soul. I once spent 17 and 1/2 consecutive hours in the school library studying; she once jumped out of an airplane. I'm logical to a fault and she's sympathetic to a fault.

Each of brings something to the relationship that the other needs. I can put emotions aside and make tough decisions based on logic, and Hani can make me put logic aside when the decision-making is finished. I need her to give me those things I don't have, and if I didn't have her I wouldn't be as complete a person.

Of course we're not so different that we don't identify with each other. We share common interests, likes, and dislikes, and that gives us opportunities to do things together that we both enjoy. But what makes us "compatible" is the fact that we can each do things we don't particularly enjoy but that the other does, and we can each enjoy it by virtue of making the other person happy.

Case in point: I find myself going to soppy movies about forbidden love between various magical creatures. I think during our next visit we'll be seeing "Bloody Horny: The Story of a Vampire That Loved a Unicorn". But regardless how many musclebound werewolves strip their shirts off in the rain, I enjoy taking Hani to the movies because it's fun and we can have fun together. We don't need to like the same movies for a night out at the multiplex to be a good time.

The thing is, that feature of our relationship - enjoying each other's company even while doing something we're not particularly into - isn't something that a dating service can predict. Sure, you can ask "would you take your significant other to a movie about lovestruck gnomes?" but that doesn't help establish compatibility. You have to have a good relationship first, and if it's solid, those things will come naturally. And if and when they come, that's what shows "true" love.

Now before I turn into Dr. Phil, let me say that I don't pretend to have some formula for true love, nor am I even able to define it. If you're looking for a description of love you'd be better off asking Hani; I'm an engineer! But I do know that Hani and I have a truly loving, "compatible" relationship, and that we will continue to love and compat. I'll go to her movies and she'll go to mine, and between the two of us we'll make it through anything.

I never liked Valentine's Day until I met Hani. To be honest, I still believe that it's an artificial holiday intended to boost Hallmark's first-quarter figures following the post-Christmas slump. But since Hani and I have been together, I don't care. It's an excuse to brag about my girl, take her out, and show off our relationship a little. We're behind on the going-out-and-showing-off, an unfortunate result of the physical distance between us, but I make up for it with the bragging! And like I told Hani, once we're together in person we have a lot of dates to go on.

I have the best girl in the world. I know you all are happy with your significant others, but seriously, Hani can't be beat. We fit together like it's meant to be and while we have our differences, they compliment each other. Even when things are stressful or we're struggling through a rocky patch, I'm happier with Hani than I've ever been before, ever. I can be myself around her and let her see the stupid side that I usually mask in robot-like stiffness.

My friends were surprised when we announced our engagement, and for good reason. At least one person said that he was shocked that I was the first in that particular circle of friends to get married (specifically, he said that he expected I would craft an electronic date out of spare computer parts!). Having never before been with someone about whom I felt that way, I can understand their reactions: Hani is the only person to pull me completely out of my shell and the only person I want to spend my life with.

And I do: I intend to spend the rest of my life with this girl.

It's Valentines day (in Malaysia anyway; another hour here in Florida) so I guess I have to offer some cupid-esque definition of true love. Log off your dating services and put aside your heart-shaped boxes of chocolate, because this is all you need!

True love is a love in which you can switch from passion to silliness and back without missing a beat:

Engagement, again?

2010-02-13T21:54:00.004+08:00

Everyone knew that Gruffy and I didn't have a traditional Malay engagement. Ours was done the western way - he surprised me with a romantic night time proposal and we were considered officially engaged. My parents were ok with it and I didn't mind either. Especially given the circumstances we were in.

But Dad voiced out the other day when we were discussing about solemnization and hantarans for it that he'd like to have a Malay merisik/engagement when Gruffy comes in March - something basic and simple, just to make it more official, in some ways. Mommy talked to me about it and said something like "you're leaving to be with Nathan soon and you're the youngest, so let's give Dad things that he wants ok? And he doesn't want that much..." so I guess we're gonna have one in March and I don't really mind :) especially when they're writing the cheque :P

So today, we went to Nilai to look and survey wedding stuff. I knew my mom has good eyes when it comes to creative crafty stuff but not dad. Apparently he does too. And he picked all the cases/boxes for hantarans for our engagement. They are not much, nothing extravagant, but I love them. They fit the idea of having a basic, simple yet sleek kinda celebration :)

Daddy decided to get somewhat traditional looking trays/cases for stuff we're going to give to Nathan and from Nathan to me, they'll be somewhat modern-ish and western-ish. He picked every single one of them and I was so surprised, in a very good way at how good my dad was at choosing. He also picked 3 other cases to put in souvenirs for my future in laws; Dad&MomBlythe as well as Kathleen.

We haven't decided on the settings for our hantarans for nikah but Mommy and I share the same basic idea and we did see things that we both like for those. We'll have to go to Nilai again soon and get those things. I'm definitely excited!!

Now just need to get Gruffy's kain songket to go with his baju nikah. Daddy wants to get him a nice songkok too - now I keep having this image of him wearing the whole nikah getup. Adorable! haha

It's kinda weird, but I am excited that I am getting engaged, yet again! To the same guy! haha Aaah, the beauty of interracial relationship :)

commitment

2010-02-11T15:05:00.002+08:00

In about 5 months, if all things go well, I will be someone's wife. When that time comes, there will be somewhat significant changes and it's not just gonna be "miss hani" to "mrs. nathan blythe". If I may say so, the changes have been taking place ever since I committed myself to Gruffy, in terms of relationship. But of course, the more serious ones come gradually as the status of our relationship progresses towards the lifelong commitment, like marriage.

I enjoy the process of planning our wedding receptions, especially when one of it is going to be held quite differently. It's a lot of pressure, I can't deny that but it doesn't take the excitement away, not even one bit.

But the receptions are as far as that celebration will go, if vows that were said and promises made are taken lightly as soon as the whole event is over. Reception is for a day, marriage is for life - I'd like to be married to one guy and one guy only. And I hope that our lives together will be as great as how we plan our receptions to be.

I know that different people have different ideas of how life should be lived and when certain occasions should take place. I had plans of how I wanted my life to be too - I still do. But there were some alterations made. And alteration, or rather change is the key word here.

It does not mean that I am throwing away those plans down the drain just because the plans I had couldn't be carried out due to the changes that are taking place. But I simply have to alter them so they fit just fine in the new plans.

Hence the reason why I think I am so fortunate to have found someone who supports me and motivates me to keep living the dreams as much as we both could afford to. Apart from having to move to a different country in the future and leave loved ones and familiarity behind, I don't think I've ever had to make big sacrifices. And with leaving loved ones, I won't really use the word leaving. It's more like moving out and moving on, the way I did when I first started working.

When people ask stuff like "aren't you going to miss your family?", well of course I am going to. But it's tough to explain to people or justify how I see things. I could say that because I'm used to being apart from them - I was in boarding school for 5 years, went to college then went overseas and got posted far away from home. But that's not really the case. It's a factor why it's easier to accept but another factor is that because I know that my parents are happy with how I turned out and it doesn't matter how much they still think I'm their baby girl, I'm all grown up and they have to slowly let go. And they have.

Letting go does not mean that the bond is broken, if anything, I think the bond gets stronger because we now share views as adults and talk about stuff as adults. Of course they can't avoid talking to me the way they did to a 5 year old sometimes, but the relationship has blossomed more and more and like I said, gets stronger each and everyday.

Of course there will be things that people think I'd miss out on after I become someone's wife. But come to think of it, I've never been that much of a social butterfly - if that's what they meant. As for career path, I actually know that I will get to do what I really want to do. I love teaching, it's one of my greatest passions. But I also have a greater one. And Gruffy has been a big part of it progressing from being just a dream and a wish to something that's going to be real.

I am ready to settle down. I know it's not gonna be easy and as lots of experienced people have told me, there will come a time when things will seem shady and you'd start thinking about what-ifs. But if you make it through with your partner holding your hand and walking by your side, it's meant to last a lifetime.

Marriage is a lifelong commitment. Bring it on.

The Move

2010-02-07T01:15:00.019+08:00

Hani has been posting lots of good information on our upcoming wedding, so this post is a little late, but hey, at least it made it.

Last weekend (actually, Friday) I moved from my old apartment to our new place. I say "my" and "our" because my old apartment I picked myself and this new apartment was chosen because it will be a good home for Hani and me together.

For about two weeks before the move I had been spring cleaning, which was convenient as it reduced the amount of junk that had to be cleared out when it came time to pack. For example, I had already reduced my inordinately large collection of computer components, cables, and pieces to this tidy pile.

I began by packing up things like desk supplies and the utility closet - the sort of things that I could easily get back out if I needed. Here is my living room on the first day of packing, with the NFC championship on in the background.

The living room slowly filled with boxes. I like to pack homogeneously - that is, I don't like to have a mix of tiny, small, and large boxes, cardboard, plastic, and loose items. Instead I buy a huge number of identical plastic crates (in a few different sizes) and label them all with notecards. They stack and they're relatively easy to move around, so they're perfect for moving.

I packed most of my clothes into boxes relatively early in the process. Hani would never have let me wear clothes that were wrinkly from being stuffed in a box, but the engineers on campus are less concerned with fashion; if those guys can get to school mostly dressed it's a good day!

The next step was to move the furniture from my bedroom into the living room. It wasn't too bad - most of my furniture is relatively simple (no wrought-iron bed frames!) but the dresser was tough. Here you can see my desk (which, for the time being, I left in the corner of the living room so I had somewhere to sit) hidden behind the growing collection of furniture and boxes.

At this point I realized that I made a mistake - there were piles of boxes separating the door and some of the larger furniture! The furniture had to go in the truck first, so I took a couple hours and moved everything around in an attempt to make the truck-loading process easier. Naturally the TV stayed plugged in!

This process took several days. I was working on campus during the day and my second job at home at night, so I was only able to do a certain amount of packing each day. Since I had dismantled my bed early on and moved the pieces to the living room, I was reduced to sleeping on my mattress on the floor.

I packed up the kitchen next, washing any remaining dishes and clearing out the cupboards. I have quite a few dishes - all told I had 7 boxes of dishes and kitchen equipment, compared to 4 boxes of clothes! By this point I had moved my desk to where I could easily get it out the door, my "office" became my chair and the kitchen counter.

Finally, after several days, I was ready to pack. This isn't everything - there were some boxes in the bedroom and of course the mattress (so I wouldn't have to sleep on the floor the last night) but by and large this is most everything I own.

I went to pick up the truck Thursday afternoon. When I moved from New Jersey to Florida a year and a half ago, my dad and I rented a 10-foot truck. A 10-foot truck is a nice sized truck... it held everything I owned with not much space to spare. I reserved a 10-foot truck for this trip as well, because I don't have that much more than I had last time. When I arrived at the truck rental place, however, I was informed that they were out of 10-foot trucks! Instead I was "upgraded" to a 15-foot truck for the same price.

Now if you're not familiar with trucks, or volume calculations, or you're a metric-user, let me explain. A 15-foot truck doesn't sound that much bigger than a 10-foot truck, right? I mean 5 feet, that's like 1.5 meters. No big deal. But you see, a 10-foot truck is like a really big storage box on the back of a really big oversized pickup-truck. It's big, sure, but when you see it you think "big car". A 15-foot truck, however, is a small semi. It's massive. This truck towered over my apartment building, dwarfed other trucks on the road, and started with an unholy roar. It was diesel and almost too tall to drive through most gas-stations (instead I had to use the trucker-line). This was a monster truck! Here it is parked outside my apartment complex.

I was terrified of driving this thing in heavy traffic so I decided to leave very early Friday morning to beat rush-hour. But first I had to pack it. I originally intended to take more pictures, but it was really difficult to load the truck by myself. Lifting some of this furniture and wheeling box after box down the sidewalk, lifting them onto the pneumatic lift (yes, this truck required a pneumatic lift to get into the back), and then arranging them inside was physically exhausting. But as the afternoon turned to night my apartment slowly emptied.

The next morning I frantically tried to pack the last few things into the truck (mattress, bathroom things, etc) and then got on the road around 5 AM. The plan was to drive the 2-hour trip to the new place, move in, drive the 2-hour trip back, return the truck, and drive my car the 2-hour final trip back to our new home. The interstate was very empty and the weather was clear in the early hours of the day and the drive was actually fairly uneventful. After about an hour on the road I was getting comfortable with the truck and was confident changing lanes, etc. That might sound silly, but if you've never driven a big truck you don't know how intimidating it feels!

At about 7:30 AM I arrived at the bridge from Tampa to St. Petersburg, about 15 minutes away from the new apartment.

The apartment complex office didn't open until 8 so I had about 15 minutes to kill before I could get the keys and begin moving in. I enjoyed the (chilly, but nice) weather and walked around a little, and discovered this truck parked a few doors down. I don't think I'll be getting too friendly with my new neighbors!

Once I had the keys I got in the zone and didn't have time for many pictures. My arms were killing me (I had just loaded the truck the night before and only got a few hours of sleep!) but I persevered and eventually everything was in the new place, if not particularly organized.

Afterwards I closed up the truck and drove back to Gainesville, where I finished cleaning my old apartment and tossed the last few things in my car. I returned the truck and drove another two hours back down south, but this time locking the keys in the apartment behind me and heading off to our new home!

It took a few days but I'm now completely settled. I went to the store and got the necessary things for the house, and (with the notable exception of Hani's "imagination room", which is currently a collection of boxes of computer things and work equipment) everything is where it belongs. Check out the view from the bedroom!

What I like best about this place is the view. I never figured that would be a huge factor in where I live, but man, it really makes a difference to relax and listen to the fountain and look out onto the lake.

So there you have it. It was a long two days, and my arms and back were killing me for the remainder of the week. The new place is great and I think Hani will love it. I like it here but to be honest it's sort of empty without her... it won't be properly ours until she's here with me.

I'll finish this picture-heavy post with a snapshot of an award I won when I was little. I found this in one of the boxes as I was unpacking. Who's the top pumpkin? I am!

another box ticked

2010-02-05T20:21:00.004+08:00

actually few more other boxes ticked.

My mommy called earlier to ask whether we're good about the dates picked for solemnization and family reception since she needs to meet up with her niece about crucial stuff for family reception.

My mom's niece - which is my cousin used to work with Malaysian Airlines. I forgot when exactly she stopped working with them but currently she has this big catering business for all sort of events - weddings included. The best thing is that she has her own nursery (flowers, not the child care center) so fresh flowers are part of the deco. She's done multiple corporate events and big shots' weddings so my mom decided we should just hire her for my family reception.

I told mom how much Gruffy and I are budgeting for the family reception so that my mom could keep that number in mind. It was somewhat relieving to hear that my cousin would not only do the catering, but also the pelamin, or the "Throne" as Gruffy calls it and the whole bridal make up and hair and what not.

What's left is for me to inform my cousin about our theme colour - my mom helped me to decide this one when we went to get kain for our "baju sanding" last weekend because the initial colour I wanted didn't look as good. All my baju kurungs - the kain, design and everything are all courtesy of my mom's sharp eyes. She really does have good taste when it comes to hal-hal kain. And all are approved by people around me and my friends. So I really don't mind her choice of colour, I think it's great.

I also need to tell them how I want my pelamin to be - my mom suggests that we have an outdoor pelamin for sanding, which I actually totally agree on for few legit reasons. And we might have simple mini dais for solemnization.

Tengok aje lah nanti :)

I kinda like this - puncak kasih collection

So all essential things for family reception are considered settled - as in, they're being taken care of. Next on the list is our gubahan hantaran - since we have to do for both sides, sebab macaam mana la pulak my OrangPutih wants to do hantaran and all. So I need to tell mommy - again, she's doing all these on her own (with my help and her sisters of course) how I want them to be.

I think we're settled on 7 berbalas 9. We did our budget according to that amount of trays. I'm excited to do wedding gifts shopping hehe some I think Gruffy will get in the states, for things that are cheaper over there and some we're gonna get them here when Gruffy comes over in March. Boy we have lots to do in that one whole in March!

gubahan hantaran ni...I still am undecided of how I want them to be. I do have a penchant for those minimalistic yet classy ones. I'm not a big fan of over garnished/crowded kinda hantaran. So we'll see. My mom has good eyes, so I'm sure between the two of us, we'll find something that's nice. She also said she'll email me her version of the budget for family reception so Gruffy and I can look at it and make amends wherever necessary.

Arghhh I need to go borrow past bridal magazines from people! And get new ones! cos I still need to come up with a baju sanding design for myself!

Say cheese!!

2010-02-04T22:07:00.006+08:00

I am as vain as the next girl is :P so naturally I want my pre wedding and wedding photos to look great. I'm not photogenic and most of the times, if I'm not wearing my glasses you could barely see my eyes whenever I smile (super slanted eyes ok) so it's highly crucial for me to find a great photographer who'd be able to make me look good :P

I don't really care how Gruffy looks cos honestly, he looks great in photos...like all the time. That upsets me haha

Apart from that, I'd wanna hire one who's friendly and able to make us feel at ease. And knowing I have like less than 5 months left till our wedding and with friends telling me to move fast because all the good photographers would be all booked out if I didn't move fast, I panicked!

So I looked through all the contacts I have and I remembered one that AnnaRina recommended to me because she's all booked out on the dates I wanted and knowing how great of a photographer she is, I trust her judgment and I contacted Fiona and luckily she's free on the date of my second reception.

We're also gonna get her to take our pre-wedding photos and I'll be meeting up with her team on my CNY break to discuss details and get the final quotation. In her email she sounds like a really nice person and just gives this really friendly vibe. So hopefully we'll be able to mesh just fine - I'll find that out when I meet them soon!

Though that's kinda like 60% settled/confirmed (it'll be official after the meeting I guess, depending on how I feel about it) I still need a photographer for my solemnization and my family reception. The reason why I need 2 different ones is because the nature of the two receptions - they're the complete opposite of each other. I know Fiona is highly capable of taking great photos during our second reception because she's somewhat associated with the venue for our second reception and I've seen her work.

But for solemnization and family reception, it's going to be full with all things cultural, so I need someone who will know how to direct us yet still could click with us on the same level. Ok fine, I don't know how to explain but yeah, I basically need 2 different ones hehe

And thankGod for good friends.

A friend of mine from college has started doing some freelance photography and she takes great photos. At first I was just asking her if she knew anyone who'd be able to take up the job - but then she volunteered herself! And gives me great discount for two-day event :) I love discount hehe plus she said since I'm the first client from the same college, she's gonna give me unlimited exposures and will keep snapping away till my nose bleeds hehe

So as far as I'm concerned, I have the wedding photos issues settled. Of course I still need to wait and see how it goes with Fiona and her team, but I think it'll go well.

and hopefully she'll capture gorgeous photos of us&our second reception, just like the one above ;) and many many more!

St. Pete

2010-02-02T22:33:00.009+08:00

One of the things that goes hand in hand with planning a wedding and getting married is deciding how the living arrangement would be once we're legally married. Some choose to buy a house, some choose to rent, some to choose to wait a little longer till they find the right house - like choosing a partner, choosing and picking a house somehow depends on the chemistry you have with the particular one.

For us, of course we are going to have to put up with long distance relationship for at least another 4 months after we get married. But knowing that didn't really stop us from searching high and low for the perfect place we could call home.

Coincidentally, Gruffy landed a great job down in St. Pete so instead of staying in our place in Gainesville and find a new one once the date for me to move there gets closer, we decided we should just find "the house" for Gruffy to move into, and for me when the time comes, in St Pete of course.

We looked online for the places that match our criteria for a newlywed house, or apartment rather: washer&dryer in our unit, minimum 2 bedrooms - one for us and one for my imagination room, great kitchen, one that allows us to have pets cos I want a fat cat and a nice neighbourhood in general.

I looked at floorplans of multiple places and some places have really nice lofts - I love love love lofts. But most lack other top criteria so we decided to ditch the lofts. We ended up with a list of few potential places and Gruffy would go down to St. Pete, check out the places and take photos to show me.

And our lady luck was on our side - we found the perfect place, at the perfect price with an awesome view. The whole place is just perfect and Gruffy kept telling me how much he liked the place. Judging from the pictures, I thought it was really nice too.

I felt instant chemistry with the house and sparks flew - so I knew, we both knew that it was the one.

Of course the place has to be more than just nice but Gruffy's great with figuring those things out, so figure those things out he did and I'm happy to report that we officially live in St. Pete now.

Fine, I don't live there just yet...but I will soon! Don't kill my excitement ok :P Anyway, some visuals!

our great kitchen :)

spacious living room that connects to the dining room. I love that the whole house is tiled and only the bedrooms are carpeted.

the part of the house that won me over - a cute mini deck that overlooks the lake. Gruffy's spotted few birds passed by and ducks swimming in the lake

The management mentions about the occasional gator sighting around the area. Though it sounds kinda dangerous, I actually am excited to hear that cos sighting a gator is a part of the experience living in Florida. Of course they have their gator control team at the ready so there's nothing to be worried about, though it'd still be a great shock (a cool one!) to open the door in the morning and find a 5 foot gator laying right at your door step :P And the fact that our apartment is so near to the lake, well, maybe Gruffy will be making friends with some and put up pictures here ;)

At least that will help remind him that the Gators will always be with him :)

Gruffy also mentioned the awesome mornings and evenings at St. Pete because it gets great views of both sunrise and sunset. So I'm anticipating tons of romantic relaxing mornings/evenings when I'm there hehe

Right now, apart from settling details for our wedding, I'm drafting my Imagination Room :) I told Gruffy that I'd start with just getting basic things I need for my book writing/illustrating like an easel, an inspiration board and a desk. I'll furnish it slowly. Then this conversation took place;

gruffy: yeah I was thinking an easel, your board, a nice day bed, some bean bags and a TV
me: TV? we're gonna put the big TV in my room?
gruffy: No that's my TV and we'll put that in the living room. I'll get you a new one and you can watch Eloise and your other shows.
me:heeeeeeeeee! Can I get like a Hello Kitty one or a Disney one?:P

so I have the choice to think that Gruffy is just so sick of my kiddy shows he's much rather getting me a new TV than having to suffer through hours and hours of Eloise on repeat or he's just being really supportive and just totally spoiling me and wants me to be inspired in the environment I work best in.

ok I choose the later :P And I can't wait to move into our new house and complete the new generation of Blythe family :)

on your mark, get set, PANIC!

2010-01-31T16:30:00.003+08:00

The first thing my parents and I talked about as soon as I got home was to fix a date for my solemnization and wedding reception at home. I'm glad to report that we've settled on a date that we all like and one that compliments my second reception.

(will announce the date here once Gruffy gives me the green light ;)

It hadn't really dawned on me that it was happening - of course I was excited but I wasn't really paying attention at how soon the date actually is.

But yesterday mom asked me to go get all the wedding dress(es) and also Nathan's outfits materials with her. And on the way she kept repeating the fact that she'd have to get moving fast about preparing and doing things.

Of course, there and then...it hit me. I have only like 5 months left!!!! And I have tons and tons to do!!

Thank goodness my planner has arrived so I've started noting things down and getting things organized. I love love love my planner - it's an early Valentines gift from Gruffy and it's adorable :) I also plan to use it for my reception stateside because there are sections that aren't applicable to Malay wedding. It's a big thick one - bigger than my head so I am very sure I'll have tons of space to plan 3 wedding receptions :)

I love the handbag-like handle. easy to carry around!

mindy weiss is a genius ;)

cute illustration! It has one for every section!

and I love how it'll be a good memorabilia for me to keep, with photos and all :)

The few things I need to settle in the next week is 1) to email my 2nd reception planner and confirm the date and get him to re-quote everything since there are some significant changes to how it was planned last year - I better go through the most recent quotation and inform him if there's any more changes and inquire about their associate photographers 2) contact photographer/videographer for 1st reception 3) browse for designs for my solemnization dress as well as my reception dress because mom wants to send them to our tailor when I come home for CNY break 4) come up with a guest list for 2nd reception so we could send our save-the-date(s) 5) discuss with my maid of horror and my bridesmaids about the colour of their dresses :)

Once Gruffy' internet all set up at our new house, we need to go over the budget and discuss about the details more then. And yes, Gruffy is all settled in St Pete and keeps telling me how nice our new house is - we have awesome view of both sunrise and sunset every single day. Not to forget the animals roaming around the area (gators included! haha) but mostly nice pretty birds and ducks swimming in the lake. He'll blog about our new house with photos I'm sure once he's able to.

Everything's slowly falling into it's respective place :) and we hope when Gruffy's over here in March we'll be able to get the documents sorted easily. My dad went to get the checklists for both of us and we only need to make sure we have everything compiled during Gruffy's stay here in March.

now there's only one thing left to do....PANIC!!

two cents

2010-01-26T23:17:00.005+08:00

I don't think that it's fair to say that people of different professions have the leisure to change careers just because they don't have something as obvious like "ikrar guru" like teachers do. Anyone of any profession, teachers included have the choice to change career, breaking vow (I actually think it's more of a contract issue above everything else) or not. And quitting or giving up has effects (good and[or]bad) regardless of what it is that we give up.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that a profession doesn't sum up the whole personality of a person.

There's good and bad in everything. A coin has two faces. There's always another side to the story you've heard.

For every good teacher, there's a not so good one. For every trustworthy cop, there's a corrupted one. Same goes for every possible job you can think of. And it's your choice really, which side of the coin you wish to be on. But calling out on people isn't always the best thing to do.

It's tough to not be judgmental but the least that we could do is try. People quit or give up once in a while but it doesn't mean they are less committed or have less credibility than others. And it certainly doesn't give us the right to think we are higher and mightier than those who chose to take that exit out - because some day we might have to take the very same one.

We all have our good days and what are good days without the bad ones? Just try take a breather and keep our tact intact.

It really doesn't hurt. But then again, it's just my two cents worth.

grad student no more

2010-01-25T21:30:00.004+08:00

did I ever mention one of the things I loved doing when I was back in Gainesville was going to campus with Gruffy on weekdays he had to do research? I liked the fact that I was being exposed to life as a grad student, which I will be soon and also because I loved watching Gruffy doing the reindeer each time he was in deep thoughts, thinking some crazily high level of mathematics - an intelligent man at work is a major hot view ;) It was also because I could sit there and do my own thing i.e. watched past seasons of survivor on my laptop, played games but still being in the company of my baby.

Gruffy's cubicle

big silverback gorilla on Survivor

once in a while I'd look over to stare at my man obsessively :P

and then I'd ignore him for scribblenauts!

Usually Gruffy would go into campus around lunch time and stay on until 7 or 8 at night. If I tagged along, around 5 or 6 he'd take me to eat and let me have a cookie from Starbucks - my baby always spoils me. I really just enjoyed being there, being in his company and being able to see what he really did as a grad student.

I'm not sure if I have mentioned it here, but Gruffy went to grad school with the intention of pursuing his doctoral degree. He's already halfway there - he officially graduated with masters in EE last December. He's also got a professor to fund him for his research so basically he already had everything figured out.

Till I came along...

Getting married is not just fun and rainbows - it's a lifelong commitment and it comes with great responsibilities. Suffice to say, being a grad student without a proper income isn't gonna cut it for married life. Gruffy's a very traditional and old-fashioned when it comes to the matter of bread winner. He wants to provide and support and takes the responsibility seriously.

I guess you could figure out what happen next.Yes, Gruffy is leaving school after getting a great job offer in St. Pete.

Before you say it, of course I feel guilty. I know Gruffy loves his research and things he's done at UF. But I guess at the same time I am grateful too that I'm marrying a man who loves me so much and would do anything to make sure I get to live life happily and comfortably.

Of course Gruffy would go back to school some day and finish his doctoral degree. He'll always be a Gator and one day he'll go back and claim back the Gator Geek throne he has to leave for the time being.

Me? I'm just happy that he is mine - gator geek, senior engineer, whatever the title is, he is my baby and I'm so glad he's mine :) the only difference is that I can't tag along to work and I won't be able to check his fine ass out whenever he gets up to get something...

awww nuts! =P

be that one special teacher

2010-01-23T20:52:00.007+08:00

"Onizuka is always at his happiest when the Principal of the school calls him Onizuka Sensei. He doesn't care that people think he's incompetent for the job, he just knows he loves being one and he always does everything sincerely..."

Yesterday my best friend from boarding school gave me a surprise call. We caught up on few stuff, like her new life as a wife, my wedding plans and being the working adults we are now, we of course talked about jobs and things related to it.

Which sort of inspires me to write this blog post. It's a topic I have long kept to myself, maybe just talked or discuss about it with Gruffy or my few close friends but there was something that was said last night, during that phone call that makes me want to finally put down my thoughts.

I hope that I won't offend fellow teachers with this post. I do hope it can be something we could all reflect on, including myself.

I've read, heard and maybe the thought has even crossed my mind once or twice; the thought about people not acknowledging the teaching profession or people don't value it as much and look at teachers as the bottom of the career hierarchy. Often, the dissatisfaction expressed is always about how others, who aren't teachers, do not appreciate the hard work that teachers have put in.

For short, some teachers think that others look down on them just because they think, that others thought that teaching isn't as exclusive or classy as other professions.

While I do sometimes desire the recognition and appreciation for a job well done or my effort at doing my best at school, it has never crossed my mind that teaching is a profession that people do not value. My mom was a teacher before she became a lecturer and a professor, even my dad taught for like a year after finding out engineering market was tough to break at that time. He saw how teaching affected young minds he decided he'd pursue education related career too - at the ministry of education. And I saw how their students, parents and their friends appreciated them and what they do, very much so. I know they knew that they were appreciated too because as long as I could remember, I never heard them said that of the major challenges that come with being a teacher is to change how people perceive the profession.

Because teachers are valued everywhere. And we really don't need people to tell us of their approvals of our profession. Even if they don't approve, it doesn't mean anything.

What I have learned from growing up around people who teach for a living is that teaching is as noble as how a teacher sees and especially how she or he accepts it. If teachers think that people look down on them just by being teachers, now what does really say about the vibe you've been giving your students.

You gotta love what you do, because it will definitely show. But saying you love it and telling the world how noble you think the profession is after you expressed how negative you think others are about your job, I believe that it is nothing more than a desperate plea for reassurance and others to tell you how great they think that you are a teacher.

"One looks back with appreciation to the brilliant teachers, but with gratitude to those who touched our human feelings."

I know that everyone in the world has at least a memory of a teacher at school. And I think more often than not, it's a good one. Whether they show it, or tell their appreciation to that teacher, it is really isn't a teacher's place to demand them to do so. I think that all individuals, not just teachers, who do their job with the utmost sincerity from the heart, would hardly think or worry about whether people appreciate their work or what they have done.

They just keep on going and do the best they can. Maybe there'd be little grumble here and there and things could be tiring at some point...but after a little rest, they brush off the sweat and pick up where they left off, high spirited as ever.

Of course I am far from being the perfect or ideal teacher I just talked about. But I hope I'll get there, someday. With the support of everyone around me, I know I'll get there. One of the best motivator is when I met my boarding school friends and they ask "How's school?" and listen to my many stories or funny encounters at school.

So fellow teachers...people DO appreciate you. They do think it's a great job and they understand the kind of pressure we face because any career in this world has its fair share of stress and obstacles and whatnot. By telling the world that you think they don't appreciate you isn't the way to gain that appreciation or recognition you so desire.

Appreciate others, always try to eat a slice of humble pie from time to time and keep your sincerity at its best. Because what the teacher is, is more important than what he teaches. You know what they say, good teachers are costly but bad teachers cost more. And a good teacher doesn't only teach, but inspire. To inspire, you need to have it in you, can't find it in the text book.

Don't be the bad one. Be the one, that one special teacher.